Assertiveness with ChatGPT
I think some people — like I once did — react to the very word holidays with a nervous headache, a tight stomach, and vivid fantasies of going to Bytom to pick out their final studio apartment in the form of a coffin. Ideally at a funeral home in Bytom, for the right atmosphere.
If you’re the cautious type, always “fully insured,” I have an exercise for you that genuinely works:
training assertive responses with ChatGPT.
Yes — exactly like training muscles. The more we practice, the greater the chance that in the most stressful moment we won’t have to think at all. The words will simply come out of our mouths on their own — calm, assertive, steady. No shaking voice required.
Why talk to a robot at all?
Because it’s a bit like a dress rehearsal before stepping onto a stage.
If we prepare our answers in advance, then when the hit comes (“So when are you having kids?” “Are you still single?”), we feel safer and more grounded.
ChatGPT doesn’t judge.
It doesn’t interrupt.
It doesn’t make faces.
You can practice with it endlessly.
How to do it in practice
Depending on what you’re dealing with, you can prepare a specific prompt for your conversation with ChatGPT.
🔹 Option 1: Child-free by choice
(on this topic, I speak as an expert)
Sample prompt:
I want to practice calm, assertive responses to family questions about when I will have children.
I want the answers to be short, non-aggressive, without explaining myself or feeling guilty.
Ask me questions as if during a family holiday dinner and help me develop responses.
You can also specify:
“very gentle version”
“with humor”
“one-sentence answers”
“when the other person keeps pushing”
🔹 Option 2: Questions about private life
(without labels and without explaining yourself)
Sample prompt:
I want to practice responses to questions about my private life, such as:
“So when will you have a partner?” “Aren’t you afraid of being alone?” “Maybe you should find someone?”
I want calm answers that close the topic and protect my boundaries.
Role-play this conversation with me.
An important reminder at the end
Remember: you always have the right to refuse to answer.
Your mental health is more important than an aunt’s disappointment, an uncle’s opinion, or a comment that starts with “I’m just asking.”
You also have the right not to go home for the holidays at all.
Your mental health matters more than other people’s expectations.
And at the same time — something I warmly recommend after meeting wonderful twins who genuinely love the holidays — you can simply re-enchant them. Invite close friends. Create a family you chose yourself. And celebrate your own version of the holidays.
On your terms.
